do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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