his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
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I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
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my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
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