Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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