I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
