I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
