you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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