Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
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what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize