smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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