Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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