Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just had sex on a roof
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
