did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize