she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
