we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
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