Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize