My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize