if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
