Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
