Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
You pole danced in your parka.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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