I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize