How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
