at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
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Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
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He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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