...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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