i think i have herpe
just one?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
