i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
