I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
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Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
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Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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