"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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