lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Randomize
