Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Randomize
