shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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