try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
