I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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