video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
