Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize