Already got asked if we're dating
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
