bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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