dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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