EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
