considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
