I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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