I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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