so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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