What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
