dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
