At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize
