Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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