Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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