im holly from the hills drunk
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
