so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
