..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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