# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My hand turned me down
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
