I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
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You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
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Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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