How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
