I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Randomize