I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
